Choose again.
Cleaning Service text: “Do you want us to clean this month?”
Me: “Yes. What time will you arrive?”
Cleaning Service: “Tomorrow at 8:30am.”
I glanced over the phone to my kitchen floor. Parker’s dried slobber and spills from his water bowl dotted the floor. Food droppings he wouldn’t eat and dust bunnies congregated under cabinets.
“It’s safe,” I thought. “The cleaners have protocols in place. It’s time to get back to some normalcy. I have nothing to fear.”
The next day I woke up early to walk the dog and do a pre-cleaning cleanup. As Parker and I walked back to the house it hit me – the image of the cleaners car parked in my driveway.
I slumped down on the front porch step, huffed and shook my head.
Nobody has been inside my house for two months.
“I’ll have to wear a mask. Where do I put the dog? I should keep the windows open. What if it rains? Where will I work while they work?”
“What will my neighbor’s think?”
“What will I think?”
The following emotional roller coaster ride happened in about 3 minutes.
Self-doubt – “Why did I say yes?”
Bad/Shame – “I made a mistake.”
Sad – “I want a clean home. I want to see my cleaning ladies. I want a normal life.”
Angry – “I want my life back!” “I don’t want to think about this #(*@ virus anymore!”
I do need to think about the virus, my safety, and the safety of others.
Definition of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
According to the National Institute of Mental Health, PTSD is defined as, “A disorder that develops in some people who have experienced shocking, scary, or dangerous event.”
“It is natural to feel afraid during or after a traumatic situation. Fear triggers split-second changes in the body to help defend against danger or to avoid it. This ‘fight-or-flight’ response is a typical reaction meant to protect a person from harm.”
https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/post-traumatic-stress-disorder-ptsd/index.shtml
Signs and Symptoms
- Bad dreams
- Frightening thoughts
- Being easily startled
- Feeling tense or on the edge
- Having difficulty sleeping
- Having angry outbursts
- Distorted feelings like guilt or blame
Maybe we are experiencing PRESENT Traumatic Stress Disorder?
DO THIS.
When you can’t control external things – other people wearing masks, the economy, or the virus, identify what you can control.
Exercise your power of CHOICE.
You ALWAYS have three options:
- Yes.
- No.
- I change my mind.
I chose #3.
Me – text: “I changed my mind. I don’t want you to come today. I’m dropping a check in the mail for today’s services. Thank you.”
Making this decision was important but it didn’t make me feel better. Only that I had made the right decision at this time.
BOOST YOUR MENTAL RESILIENCE
- Be gentle with yourself as you figure out how to function during this pandemic.
- Ask for and accept help – with your decisions, processing emotions, receiving virtual support.
- Lower your expectations of what you should be doing, accomplishing, thinking.
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Exercise your power of choice.
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