Learn how to receive. It will change your life.
Identify what gets in the way of you receiving.
Elaine went on a weekend getaway with her friends. The group decided to get a facial the following day. She woke up and felt slightly dizzy. “I better not get a facial,”she told her friend Tammy. “It may make my dizziness worse.”
“They can prop you up with pillows,” Tammy said.
Elaine shrugged, rolled her eyes, and let out a heavy sigh.
“This is supposed to be fun, Elaine. You’re acting like you’re going to be tortured.”
“Fine. I’ll go,” she snorted. “But I don’t have to like it.”
Identify your obstacles to receiving.
~Self-judgment: this may be so ingrained that you have to consciously practice noticing it.
- “Am I going to be embarrassed for canceling? They are going to think I’m weird because I can’t lay down.”
- “I should be more flexible.”
- “I should be more compassionate with myself.”
~Measuring and monitoring yourself: you were taught to meet others’ expectations.
- “Why aren’t I further along in taking care of myself? My daughter would say yes immediately and yet I hesitate.”
- “I’ve done all this work on myself, and I’m still uncomfortable with self-care.”
- “Tammy said yes easily. What’s wrong with me?”
Elaine mentioned that she had never had a facial before. She believed that spending money on it was wasteful and self-indulgent.
When the towel was placed on her face, she contracted and resisted. You’re fine, she thought to herself. Let it happen. Relax. As the massage continued, she felt the tension release. You are so tightly wound, you don’t even know that you are tightly wound. She continued to unwind and receive.
Notice your thoughts when you receive compliments, time, and invitations.
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Your giving muscle is buff. Give it a rest. Spend time building your receiving muscle.
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