Resistance is an obstacle to effective decision-making.
A mental framework is an explanation for how something works in the real world. It is the basis for your thoughts and actions. It is the story you tell yourself.
Imagine the framework of a house. You build a similar framework of thoughts, beliefs, and stories in your mind. This is your mental framework.
We will use the following two mental frameworks to explain how resistance gets in the way of skillful decision-making:
- There is a finite amount in the world and I have to get it now.
- Because I believe in an abundant and friendly universe, I practice mindful success every day (get adequate sleep, exercise, eat healthfully), and I need never worry again.
These frameworks are two stories you tell yourself and they impact your decision-making, what you think of yourself, and your ease of being.
Let’s say you have made a decision to choose framework #2.
When you begin practicing this new mental framework of believing in an abundant and friendly universe, you’ll encounter resistance.
Resistance sounds like this:
“This is stupid. It’s not for me.”
“I’ve tried this and it doesn’t work.”
“What if I try it and fail?”
“Nobody else is doing this.”
“I’m sticking with what I already know. I may be unhappy, but at least I’m not uncertain.”
This inner dialog is normal and to be expected. You are building new neural pathways in your brain. Your brain is wired to resist change, to gain pleasure and avoid pain. It sees change as a threat. It has a positive intention in avoiding change: to keep you safe. That’s why all that chatter of “change back” happens.
Resistance blocks out the good reasons you are making this change.
- Decide which mental framework are you going to choose today.
- Notice your thoughts and reactions to practicing a mental framework of abundance.
- When you encounter resistance, use a curiosity phrase: “Oh, isn’t this interesting! I’m resisting using a different mental framework.” This takes the judgment out of your learning.
Improve your decision-making by understanding that resistance to change is normal and to be expected. Accept that your brain blocks out the good reasons you are making changes in order to keep you “safe.”
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Resistance is a messenger. Listen to it.
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